Saturday, December 13, 2008

Ticking.

Each day surprises me.

I miss how things were. I'll continue to miss how things were, but we're all growing up, moving on, and forgetting more.

Meeting new people, re-meeting old friends, meeting people that you'll never meet again. How do you choose, how do they choose you - do any of us actually choose at all?

Friends come and go, but when do you know that the friendship is worth fighting for? What issues do you deal with and what issues do you ignore? When do you say this is about me not you? When do you say you're just ridiculous and push it aside?

I met these people when I was in elementary school, junior high, and high school. Most of them went and well, the best ones stuck around. I met these people when I was younger as my brother's friends. I met them again, but this time as my own friends, my own family. I met these people when I started college and started getting my foot in the door, some have already gone, but some are still around and only time will tell.

The clock has started ticking.

I've never told a friend before that they were making it difficult for us to be friends, that they were acting ridiculous. At least never until about a few days ago. The thing is... I don't regret it at all. I honestly was very impressed that I was being that completely honest and open and at same time not just being a bitch. I honestly had nothing else to say - I still have nothing else to say.

I'm now just getting to that age where I can take a trip with my friends if I want to or take a trip by myself to see someone or something. When I was younger I didn't take trips without my parents or my siblings. I didn't visits to see my old friends after I moved. I'm finally starting to do that or getting to the planning portion. I'm excited, very excited. There's Europe this summer, which will be amazing and unforgettable. Tulalip for Jomel's birthday in January - it's a small one, but it's going to be AMAZING. A potential trip to Las Vegas and Los Angeles during Spring Break.

And another potential, still in my mind, really unsure trip to Los Angeles in January. I just wish things didn't have to be complicated. I just wish I knew 100% why I was going and was 100% sure that I should.

So I'm at the end of dead week and completed two of my classes. That's seven more left to graduate - three more for this semester. I'm excited and nervous - I get nervous for those damn tests. It's Jomel's last semester, last week actually - he will own the civil engineering field and make lots of money and not forget the Cua's. That really changes the dynamic for next semester... it'll be another interesting one.

This finals week will be interesting too, I have no idea what one of my finals will be like - the teacher cancelled class all week and a lot of times throughout the semester, jerk. Next semester will be cake and hopefully I can find a job so I'll know where I'm going and what I'm doing - applying is hard, selling myself is hard, I think I should just be super high when I'm interviewing - I noticed I can explain things 50 times better.

Last night Rick was asking me to explain what a MINODE and an inode was... it has to do with my systems programming course and I explained it to him, but I was able to explain it so clearly and using similes. To my teachers and TAs and professionals ask me things I blank out or unsure or I just get tongue tied. I need to work on that, but the material is too boring. Just too boring! Haha.

Oh well life gets boring sometimes. The time is now.

Oh and I was listening to the new Maroon 5 Remix CD... it's pretty amazing. & I'm watching Apple Visualizer so that helps. I'm just in a good mood. Other songs in the mix right now are Musiq's new CD - not a big fan, what's he trying to do? And Brandy - which I'm still trying to decide on.

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